Most people view retirement as a finish line. But after years of coaching, I’ve realized it’s actually the ultimate masterclass in change.
The challenge? We often try to control the timeline of our transition instead of controlling our mindset. This week, let’s look at how to navigate the “rain” of uncertainty and decide what’s worth keeping.
There are two ways to grow: by adding or by shedding.
In your career, you grew by adding—titles, skills, and assets. But in a successful retirement, growth often comes from shedding. You might need to shed an old identity, a busy schedule that no longer serves you, or the need for constant external validation.
As the writer Basil King once said, “Go at it boldly, and you’ll find unexpected forces closing round you and coming to your aid.” When you stop clinging to the old, you make room for the “unexpected forces” of your next chapter.
“Are you continuing to do it mostly because it makes you feel interested and alive—or are you continuing to do it mostly because you know what to expect and you’re hesitant to make a change?”
Practice “Thought Filtering.” When a stressful thought or a doubt about your future pops up, ask yourself: “Is this thought nourishing? Is it something I should ‘drink’ and make part of me? Or is it just rain?” You will always feel the rain, but you don’t have to claim it. This week, when a negative thought hits, acknowledge it, let it sit on the surface, and wait for it to evaporate. You can’t make time go faster, but you can control this next mental action.
Complete these four sections to find clarity on your current transition.
Identifying the “Rain” List three recurring worries about your retirement that feel like “getting caught in the rain” (temporary, external, and non-nourishing).
The Shedding List What is one habit, commitment, or belief you are holding onto simply because it is familiar?
I am holding onto: ______________________________________________________________________
The Obsession Test Novelists Patricia Highsmith suggested that sustained focus is what matters. What is one activity that makes you feel interested and alive right now?
My “alive” activity is: ______________________________________________________________________
The Next Action You can’t force the future to arrive, but you can act now. What is the one next action you can take today to move toward that “alive” activity?
My next action: ______________________________________________________________________
To your best chapter yet,
Dave Smith The Ultimate Retirement Coach